Summary:  As he drives away, he whispers two apologies: one to his boys, and one to Mary: I’m so sorry, but this is the way it has to be.
Spoilers:  Missing scene for the deleted scene from "Home" (off of the Season 1 DVDs).   SPOILER WARNING IF YOU HAVEN’T SEEN THAT DELETED SCENE! You’ve been warned.
A/N:  I assumed that the guy that Dean and Sam talk to in the garage is Mike because of John’s journal entries off of the Supernatural site.
No beta. So beware the evil typos! If you spot any grammatical errors or something that you think is out of place, don’t be afraid to say something. Constructive criticism is helpful to any writer.
READ AND REVIEW! Reviews make me all giddy:D
Disclaimer:  I don’t own them. Eric Kripke and the CW own them, but I don’t. Drat.

Almost a month after Mary dies, a social worker from Social Services shows up on Mike’s porch, and John immediately knows who made the call. He overhears the social worker talking to Mike while Kate just stands there and John knows that it wasn’t her idea—she might have thought he needed a shrink, and he probably did, but she’d never call Social Services. Never try to take his boys away.

A big part of John wants storm out of the guest room and beat the hell out of Mike right in front of that snobby social worker and show them all just how crazy he was. But that thought is quickly squashed as his eyes wander over to his boys.

Dean is sitting in Sam’s playpen, with Sam propped up against his belly, watching Sam happily shake the pair of plastic keys that have so captured his attention. The corner of Dean’s mouth quirks up a little bit—the closest to a smile that John had seen since before the fire—while Sammy babbles quietly and coos.

Another part of John wants to just give his kids the normal life that they deserve, just hand them over to Social Services, or give custody to Mike and Kate. Dean and Sam don’t deserve the life of hunting the thing that killed their Mom, and John doesn’t want to put that burden on them. Living with Mike and Kate would give them a normal life, one that they deserved. Mike and Kate couldn’t have kids on their own and John knew that they would take the boys without hesitation.

But the thought of giving up the only pieces of Mary he still had left left a pain in his chest and he knew then that he couldn’t do it. So, very quietly, he started packing up the few belongings that were salvaged from their home and motions for Dean to be very quiet. Dean nods dutifully and pride wells up inside John. Dean was his very own little soldier.

Packing all of their belongings into one large duffle bag and leaving some of Sammy’s bigger toys behind because they can’t afford to be weighed down with bags, he picks Dean up with the arm he had already had his bag on and picks up Sam’s carrier with his other hand and slips stealthily out of the side door, which was located in his room and had the car already parked outside of it. As he carefully walks to his car—a big, black, and beautiful 1967 Impala that used to be Mary’s—he feels guilt gnawing at his gut as he buckles Dean into his car seat and straps Sam in beside him.

Hopefully, the fight will be over soon and then John can take care of his sons without worrying about losing them to that evil thing that destroyed his family.

As he drives away, he whispers two apologies: one to his boys, and one to Mary.

I’m so sorry, but this is the way it has to be.

The End